April 18, 2008...11:39 pm

Unemployment: Week 1!

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Today I return to you, unemployed, drunk and over-caffeinated like an alcoholic wife beater.


Why have I stayed away so long? Now if I told you, I wouldn’t be mysterious, now would I?


Suffice to say, I AM BACK. And all of my three readers are rejoicing (Hello, three readers)!


So far, unemployment is fabulous. I wake up when I want to, I eat when I want to, and most important I get drunk whenever I mother fucking want to. Which is now, always and forever.


To be fair, I do have a job lined up. So I’m not unemployed in the “food stamps” sense. Just in a looser, “I have no obligations” sort of way. And this way allows me to blog a lot, so all three of you readers should be pleased.


Being unemployed and all, my days are much different from when I had that lame 9-5. When I take the train in from New Jersey (where The Boyfriend now resides), instead of blending in with the shuffle of worker bees off to my office for that morning meeting/coffee/assignment I just casually make my way to my cab toward my apartment because, Hey, I’VE GOT SLEEPING TO DO. And we all know how important that 10am nap is. Almost as important as my 7pm Bailey’s & coffee.


All of a sudden, my world is moving at a suburban pace in the big bad city. And I’m constantly wondering, “Why is everyone in such a FUCKING rush?” I’ve got relaxing to do, after all. So if you see me, dancing on the sidewalks with my iPod and my Stunna Shades, please be respectful. I’m trying to unwind, for God’s sake.


Peace, love, Britney. 

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